6 posts tagged “thankful thursday”

There's not been much time for anything resembling organized thought. But that doesn't mean I can't at least make note of what I'm thankful for at the moment. Heck, doing so might even help keep me from flipping out and spinning my head like the girl in "The Exorcist" today.

Seriously? Post-go-live will do that to you. The problem with a project like this is that the implementation phase is INTENSE. You all know the hours I've worked and the precious living-time I've lost in the past year. And there's a whole team of us in that boat. By the time you flip the switch and go-live, you are ALL burnt, fried and frazzled. Each and every one of us is craving sleep, a beach, ANYTHING but work.

But going live doesn't mean we get that. Because when you go live, the users start USING the system. You move into "production support," which basically means "everybody hates this and wants to yell, or at the very least needs some help." And who can help? Us. The Project Team. No rest for the weary yet.

And they don't hate it because it's bad. They hate it because it's different. People don't like change. And not everyone hates it, either. It's just that the ones who do are the loudest.

Oh, wait. This is supposed to be a thankful post. Sorry. Back to the originally scheduled program:

1. I'm thankful that we ARE live. As crazy as post-production life is, the implementation phase is over. And this part will eventually die down too. That can only be good.

2. I'm thankful that nothing blew up. You never know what will happen when you turn a ton of users on a system like this, no matter how much testing you've done ahead of time. We've had the expected glitches and bugs, but nothing out of the ordinary. That's a relief.

3. I'm thankful for the tech crew I work with. When I have had glitches and bugs, they have been so quick and responsive and awesome that I haven't had to pull my hair out. We really are a team.

4. I'm thankful for the soap my friend Jenn makes. She gave me some when she came down a few weeks ago to attend Sully's party. That stuff is like a spa visit in your own bathroom. It rocks, and so does she.

5. I'm thankful for the fact that this coming weekend will be the first two days straight that I haven't done any work in a LONG time. Come hell or high water, I'm sticking to that.

6. I'm thankful that we get to go see Lee's family and his new nephew this weekend.

7. I'm thankful that we also have a bull roast this weekend. Sure, it is with a Raven's Roost, and as a Steelers fan that should make me melt like the Wicked Witch of the West (or was it the East who melted?). But dudes, food and booze and friends. The best medicine for a stressful week's end.

8. I'm thankful that by altering my gym routine by just 10 minutes (working out 10 minutes longer), I now completely avoid standing in the mirror putting on my makeup at the time Naked Lady chooses to do her own prettification rituals in the buff. Naked-Lady-Free is good.

9. I'm thankful that even though we aren't always perfect, Lee and I can watch just about any episode of "King of Queens" and laugh our butts off at how almost all their "relationship conversations" are so much like ours it is scary. I'm not a shopaholic like Carrie, but other than that? We could SO be them.

10. I'm thankful that I got out to dinner with a girlfriend this weekend, drank a carafe of wine, and talked about anything and everything for hours. And then on Sunday, I sat out on my deck and had a wonderful phone chat with Monsoon. I spend so much time hanging out with guys, either home with Lee or at work or even amongst my own friends. I need to build more girl-time in my life.

Off to the races now. Two more days to knock out till the weekend!

With a boatload of conversions and little go-lives over the next two months, ending with our HUGE go-live on March 24th, me and my project team colleagues are all starting to look and act like frazzled walking zombies.

People who work on other floors in our building see us and just know, it seems. "Look at them. They're project people. You can tell because that one is getting in this elevator with her fourth cup of coffee today, and it isn't even noon yet. That one has dark circles under his eyes. That one? Don't think she's brushed her hair in a week."

OK, this may be a slight exaggeration. But just slight. People do sort of shake their heads and express sympathy for us an awful lot these days.

But yesterday, when I got in the elevator, something different happened. The only other person on board was a tiny older woman who has worked at the university since my student days. She's known for being a witty and call-it-as-I-see-it kinda gal.

I was kind of leaning against the elevator wall, looking, I'm sure, overwhelmed and depleted of any mental fortitude I'd brought with me that morning. She hit the buttons for both our floors, smiled, and said "Hey, remember you're not Jack Bauer. Whatever happens with your job, the world isn't going to end."

That was yesterday morning, and it has stuck with me ever since. Because she's right. Not just about me and my project team colleagues, but about all of us. Our lives are hectic and frazzled and deadline-driven and overstuffed. And sometimes, we all feel like we just can't handle it for one more minute unless we get a bit of a break.

But hey, we're not Jack Bauer.

So if we take that break, the world won't end, right?

Breathe. Smile. Revel in the fact that the weight of the world really isn't on your shoulders, even when it feels like it is.

This Thursday, I'm thankful for words exchanged in an elevator.

My thankful thing is a little silly this week, but heartfelt nonetheless.

I've mentioned before that one of the consultants who works with me on the project used to be my boss. He retired, but had been waiting for us to move into this project forever and really wanted to be a part of it. So he agreed to come back part-time to work with me on it.

As a boss, he did all the right things. He was a mentor and a friend, flexible when he should be and firm when he needed to be. He always said he didn't like managing people (much like me), but he was good at it. He had a knack for recognizing the strengths and weaknesses of the people who worked for him and helping them utilize and build on those strengths while overcoming the weaknesses.

He picked up on my writing and communication abilities right away, and helped groom me into a trainer. He wasn't afraid to admit that there were some things I (or any of his employees) did better than him. He wouldn't send out a memo or important email most of the time without having me proof it and "give it some style." On the flip side, he recognized right off the bat that I am bored to tears by working with spreadsheets and stats, and gloss over them as much as possible. He'd ride me about getting better at those things even while he heaped praise on the web site I was developing or the training I'd just given.

And, he acted as the Disposer of Creepy Crawlies for me.

Shortly after he became my boss, I happened to be sitting at my computer working one day when something big, black and many-legged buzzed over and landed on my monitor. At the time, I worked in a public building where people were always coming in and out, and buggy critters often flew in the door with our visitors.

My inability to deal with my own bug issues is well known. In a silly article I wrote about learning to live alone when I was going through my divorce a few years back, I freely admitted to the fact that since there was no man in the house anymore, I had to deal with spiders by putting the cat in front of them and hoping he'd do whatever it took to make them go away. I come by this girly squeamishness honestly. I have very clear childhood memories of my father working nights and my mother knocking on the neighbor's door to get him to come take care of some 8-legged freak that had made its way into our home.

That neighbor was a policeman, but he learned quickly that when Mom knocked and said "I have an intruder" a flyswatter or shoe would usually be more than enough weaponry.

So, the day that bug took up residence on my monitor, I flew out of my office and into that of my new boss, and told him with a squealy shaky voice that although I knew staff weren't supposed to give the supervisor the "other duties as assigned," he had one if he wanted me to continue working.

He came over, scooped up the bug, and put him outside. And laughed his butt off the entire time.

We had another incident about a year later. My sister and I were walking across campus (she worked with us back then) and a bumblebee lodged himself in my hair. Sis is even more bug-freaky than I am, and although she didn't want to leave a sibling walking around with a bee in her hair she sure as hell wasn't removing him herself. Rather than tell me what was going on, she marched me into The Bosses office, pointed to the bee, and said "Fix her."

He did, and sent the bee on his merry way.

We still laugh about those days. And they've come back to haunt us. In our project area, I actually share an office with my former boss. While he was in a meeting yesterday, I kept hearing a strange, creepy buzzing. I figured it was something to do with the vents - our building makes all sorts of noises. The elevators even growl. But then, I heard a "plop" and looked to find that a stinkbug-looking thing had landed on my desk.

Former Boss was in a meeting. I went to the kitchen area, grabbed a paper cup, and hastily put it on top of the bug. I can't squish. I can't pick them up and set them free. But I can hide them and leave them for someone else to squish or save.

Unfortunately, I then went to an afternoon of meetings and forgot about Mr. Bug. So when I get there today, I'm still going to have a bug under a paper cup waiting for me on my desk. And Former Boss is going to be asked to make him go away before we even go get our ritual morning coffee.

The cool thing is, he will, and we'll laugh about how even after retirement some of his bossman duties still linger.

On the simplest level, I'm glad to have a coworker who will get rid of bugs for me.

On a deeper one, I am thankful for this friend. That's what he was when he was the boss, and he's even more of one now that the whole heirarchy thing is removed from our relationship and we're just two people trying to manage the craziest piece of a crazy project. As I was thinking about the bug thing this morning, I also thought about how this man, a war vet who is almost 30 years my senior and loves fishing and never drinks, is truly one of my closest friends. We are proof that sometimes similarities in lifestyle and experience just aren't necessary in forming a lasting friendship.

I am blessed to have this friend.

The bug thing is just a bonus.

I feel like I've got lots to be thankful for this week, in spite of the fact that is so cold outside that my brain cells are half-frozen.

- We came home this week to a letter from the emergency animal hospital where we took Cleo that sad Sunday night last year, when we had her emergency surgery for a stomach blockage and lost her. They had made a donation to a gorilla rescue and rehab center in her name. We both just thought that was the most wonderful thing ever, and I actually got a little teary-eyed.

And the letter made us think back to the little weasely girl who was part of our lives for just a few weeks. While I chopped a salad and Lee made chicken for dinner, we talked about how joyful and full of life and fun she was, and about how Vin never used his ferret hammock until SHE started using it, then he finally decided to check it out and pile in on top of her. He still uses it now. If it wasn't for Cleo, the Vinster probably never would have discovered the sheer joy of being a ferret in a hammock. I used to plop him in it now and then before she came along, and he'd just sort of look at me like "what's so great about this?" She taught him something in her short little life.

- The gym is still ridiculously crowded after work, to the point of being more annoying than beneficial. So we decided to suck it up and start getting up extra early and going BEFORE work. Which means being at the gym at 5:30 a.m. It sounds horrible, and when I roll out of bed in the morning, it IS.

But today, after working out, I stepped into the parking lot to find a thin blanket of snow on the ground that wasn't there when we went in. A few stray flakes were still falling from the sky, and it was still dark in that just-before-daybreak kind of way. The air was FREEZING, but invigorating. For just a moment, everything was beautiful. If I'd still been home snoozing, I would have missed that snowy moment. It has stopped already. We haven't gotten much in the way of snow around here the last few winters, and I'm glad I didn't miss it.

- My co-workers and I had planned a happy hour at the family pub for after work yesterday. The plan was made before I knew we'd be shifting our gym schedule. So by the end of the day yesterday, I was really regretting it. I enjoy my co-workers AND pub time, but after such a long day I was yawning and sleepy and all I wanted to do was get home to my comfy house. A few people who were originally going to go had to bail because of things going on with their kids or in one case feeling sick. With each cancellation, I became more and more tempted not to go myself. My couch and blanket were seriously calling me. But in the end, I went, and the small but lively group of us who went ended up having a really good time, relaxing, and blowing off some steam.

Sometimes you have to force yourself out of your routine even when you don't feel like it. I did yesterday and ended up being really glad. A little social fun on a Wednesday breaks up the monotony of the workweek and makes me feel closer to Friday!

- Speaking of which, I'm thankful that it IS almost Friday, and that I have a long weekend coming!

-  Last but definitely not least, I'm thankful that Lee is still enjoying his new job so far. When you have two people who work full-time and they're BOTH stressed and not so happy in their work, it is hard to maintain a positive atmosphere at home. When one person is out of work and the other is stressed and not so happy in their work, and you're both worried about money, it is just as hard. But now, his positive outlook and hopeful attitude about each day really help ME let the stress and craziness of my own job roll off my back a bit when I get to come home. Bad outlooks and stress are as contagious as colds. But so are hope, contentments, and a feeling of looking forward to the day. His happier outlook is rubbing off on me, and not only am I glad he's in a better place, but I'm enjoying feeling a bit better myself!

Things are busy and hectic and sometimes I feel like I don't know my head from my butt, but overall, life is good. And so I'm thankful.

And it couldn't come at a better time, because I really do need to pause and realize I have lot to be thankful about.

This post will probably start more as a vent than a moment of thankfulness, but hear me out ...

It has been the week from hell. Everyone at work is frenzied. We're paying double for our week of rest. We're so close to go-live for so many things on the project. There's a sense of urgency and worry in the air. It seems like EVERYONE is stressing and not sleeping well and feeling overwhelmed. Not just me.

Add to that Lee still not feeling well and us both being stressed about the financial troubles and his work (or lack thereof) situation, and we've been kind of a mess. Wednesday was the first day he started feeling better. When I called him at lunchtime and he actually sounded energized instead of miserable, I was so happy. It felt like a weight had come off my shoulders. That's what love does, I guess. You can't stand to see your loved ones feeling bad.

The day got even better when he got a call about a resume he'd posted up on a job search site months ago. It was a temp-to-hire position, in work he's got lots of experience in, and they needed someone right away. He interviewed that afternoon and they told him he could start today. He was feeling so well he jumped at it.

They told him he needed a certain kind of work boot for the job. He had work boots for his old one, but not quite what was needed. He called me all excited and happy. He felt good, our money worries - which have mainly been making sure we can afford his medication and have SOMETHING - ANYTHING - put away for emergencies, have been wearing on us both. We've smiled through it, but we've both been scared little kids inside. And it is hard to keep each other "bucked up and going strong" when you both want to crawl in a hole and have someone tell you everything will be okay.

So we were both excited. I was working late, and the plan was for him to go get his boots, then pick me up. I got another call shortly thereafter. He had gone to the store, gotten his boots, and gone back out to the van. The damn thing wouldn't start.

For two people who are financially up a creek without a rowboat, Lee's job prospect was a blessing. The fear of him not being able to GET to that job was overwhelming. It isn't located somewhere that a cab or bus would be a viable option. A cab, maybe ... but you don't want to chance showing up late on your first day, and they arent' exactly reliable around here. Then, of course, there was the fact that he was stranded at the store, I was stranded at work (pretty much everyone else had already gone home), I was on day 3 of 12-hour-workdays, he was still not totally well, and on and on. We were both ready to lose our minds.

I took a few deep breaths, hung up with him, and called my father. Dad went and picked Lee up at the store, then took him back to the house to give him the keys to his old pickup that he uses for hauling stuff for the pub and loading firewood for the mountains. He also gave us the number of a tow-and-repair guy he uses all the time, who would be as reasonable as possible with us as far as money goes with the mention of Dad's name. Being a pub-owner who is as friendly and sociable as Dad does have its perks : ).

Lee picked me up. The guy went and got the van today and looked at it. It is going to eat the last bit of savings we had left.  

Stress. Stress. Stress.

So, how in the heck is this a "thankful" post?

Well, I'm thankful that we got the call about the job BEFORE the van took a crap. I mean, it would have done it anyway. If it had happened before the job call, spending that last bit of emergency money might have sent us both over the "curl up in a ball and cry" edge.

I'm thankful that Lee's first day went well, and he thinks he'll like the work. It sucks that he felt like he had to jump at it, when he really needed another day or two to recover from this bug. He's run-down, and jumping into a new physical job when you aren't well isn't the best way to a speedy recovery. But the job search experience has been so ... interesting (another post for another time!), that he was anxious to take something that seemed good, and afraid not to start right away because they'd specifically said they needed someone urgently. But he likes it, and he felt good being busy all day, and knowing there will be that paycheck coming does give us a needed sigh of relief. And I am so thankful for that.

I am thankful for little moments at work where we breathe and somehow manage to let all the stress roll off our shoulders. Today, that came when we were all gathered in the hallway after a meeting, and a co-worker was talking about wanting a new phone. Our project manager, who usually comes across as SUCH a serious, nose-to-the-grindstone kind of guy, whipped out his phone and started showing us the app he downloaded that let him choose from all sorts of fart noises. His kid wanted it, and he got it for himself too. It didn't convince the phone shopper to go with HIS brand, but we all stood there in the hallway saying "do the splatter one!" or "hit the hangover one again!" and listening to his phone make fart noises and laughed until half of us had tears in our eyes.

Sometimes, you have to revert to five-year-old-humor to survive the day. And when you do, it feels sooooo good. So I'm thankful for that.

And most of all, I'm thankful for my family and for the fact that I live so close to them and that Dad was there when I called, and he's always so calming, and he jumped right up and went and got Lee and gave us the use of the truck until we can get the van situated and helped us find someone who wouldn't bleed us dry to fix it. I'm thankful, thankful, thankful that I have the family I do.

I'm thankful that I'm able to admit that sometimes, life is just overwhelming, and you have to call Mom and Dad and not only get a helping hand, but hear a voice that has been soothing you since your biggest woe in the world was a skinned knee.

Ahhh ... the perfect post for me today! I really need this chance to reflect on the good things in my life by Thursday (day 4 of 5 12-hour days). It is easy to overlook all the positive while smack dab in the middle of that kind of schedule!

Today, I am thankful for:

- The packages sitting on the bed in my spare room. They are all Christmas presents for others, but I didn't have to brave the malls and I was able to find gifts that I think my loved ones will really enjoy, and to me that's what the gift-giving part of the holiday season is about. I haven't opened them up yet, because one of the boxes has a gift for Lee in it and I don't want him to see it, so I need to be in "giftwrap mode" before I tear into them. I'm thinking Sunday morning, while he's off fishing with a co-worker, I'll turn up the stereo and have my first of several little solo Christmas-wrapping parties!

- The fact that although I truly sometimes think my job is bad for my health, I at least have one. The more I see and read of layoffs and struggles, the more I realize this truly IS a blessing.

- The wonderful friends I was able to spend time with this weekend.

- Lee, Vin and Sly. Always. They make my home a happy little place.

- All the Christmas lights and outdoor decorations currently strewn about my living room. Right now they are a big pile of clutter, but come the weekend they will transform my yard into a winter wonderland.

- The two consultants who work closely with me on this project. They are just such talented people, but beyond that they have very calming personalities and really do get why my job drives me insane sometimes. An implementation like this is sort of a "you had to be there" kind of experience, and it can be hard describing your challenges and stresses to your friends and loved ones. I'm not saying it is any worse than any other type of job, just that it has its own unique "things" (I guess any job does!), and when I describe the political goings-on and so on, those not involved sometimes look at me and go "what, do you work in a freakin' nuthouse?" So having the friendship of the consultants who have been with me every step of the way in this thing is awesome.

- My wonderful mom and dad, who are letting me have our project holiday party at their pub and helping me pull it together.

- The coming holiday break ... the time leading up to Christmas is crazy and hectic, but the week afterwards is always one of rest and relaxation until New Year's Eve. The university is closed, the social events slow down just a wee bit, and there's breathing room. Ahhhhhh .....

- All of my friends here at Vox!