40 posts tagged “misc”

Unless you never leave your house and don't turn on your TV, computer, or even radio, there's slim chance that your world hasn't been somewhat impacted by the loss of some major public figures in the last week.

Farrah Fawcett.
Michael Jackson.
Billy Mays.

Even if you aren't overly emotionally impacted by the passing of these celebrities, their last adventures color your world. They're all the talk over water coolers, grocery store lines, bar stools, blogs and neighborhood fences. I'm not the type of person who dwells much on celebrity figures. But yesterday morning when Lee and I woke up and were lying in bed channel surfing, we paused on a station that was playing video after video of Michael Jackson's greatest.

Always the moonwalk in those white suits. Always that crazy thing he did with his arms. Always the robotic but somehow fluid back-up dancers. Always those Scotland-yard looking policemen chasing after the truth about Billy Jean or The Smooth Criminal.

I couldn't help but think of the impact he had on my pre-teen and teenage years. Him and Farrah both, actually. I remember being glued to MTV and as fascinated by the Thriller video as any other kid my age. I remember getting a Farrah haircut and being so darn proud of my "feathers." I remember wanting to be one of Charlie's Angels and me and my friends making silly juvenile references to "Beat It."

I never understood how people can become so attached to celebrities that they'll camp outside their homes and wail and mourn over their passing. When I was growing up, my friend Kim's mother's had Velvet Elvises (Velvet Elvi?) all over her living and dining rooms. I learned to pick my own steamed crabs at their dining room table. Once, I pulled a claw too hard and a piece of crab meat flew out and smacked a Velvet Elvis on the cheek. I thought Kim's mom was going to smack me upside my head. When Elvis died, I recall her lying on her couch, sobbing as if her world had ended. She had a strong drink of something and took a valium.

I don't get that, but I do get the sense of sadness and loss and the feeling that there's a big empty space left by these people who somehow end up in positions to so dramatically impact and change our culture.

But you know what? Celebrities are not the only people whose passing will leave sadness and loss and emptiness in their wake even if you never "knew" them in the seen-in-person sense.  At least not these days.

I've never met Karen, otherwise known as CosmicCrayola or Cosmic. But through a little corner of the online world called Diaryland - the place where I still keep my private journal today - we've known each other for years. Karen was one of the first people I began reading after starting my own journal there, and we've remained part of the same small-but-big circle ever since, in spite of lots of changes in both D-land and our lives since those early entries.

Cosmic fits her so well. She couldn't have chosen a better moniker for her diary if she'd tried. She is so grounded and real, yet so way-out-there funny and inspiring in her shining and even everyday moments. Since I've been granted access to a slice of her world through her writing, I have come to know a woman who has been through incredible medical struggles, both her own and her husband Terry's. Sometimes it seemed their lives were a roller-coaster of one or both of them battling illness and hospitalization. Yet through it all, most of her journal entries have been about those moments we all hold dearest to our hearts. Family visits. Movie nights with the hubby. Good food. Jokes that hit us all in the funny bone. Daughters and grandchildren. Writing and publishing her book. We've emailed back and forth about a friend of hers getting a ferret. 

Many Diarylanders have met in person along the way. I've formed my share of friendships that transcended our online presence through the site. Unfortunately, I haven't had the chance to meet Cosmic. Others have. I wish I'd been there. But I didn't have to be to be touched by Karen and have her crack me up even on some of my worst days.

I've been behind in my Diaryland reading. So I was a bit stunned when I saw a Facebook status update from Golfwidow that sent me to Karen's diary. There, in the slice of colorful online space where she has written countless entries chronicling his medical battles - with the love, fear and humor that only she could - her husband Terry had posted an update letting us all know that Karen's longtime struggle is winding down. She'd been given just days, and that was a few days ago.

I may not get what I call "extreme celebrity mourning." But I am well aware of how much we can be touched by people we've never actually met through words and screens. Karen is my friend. Because she is still here, I pray for a miracle and hope that this isn't a farewell post but rather just an observation about how much people we haven't met can come to mean something good to us and change our lives. There will be an empty space in my heart that was usually filled with a laugh or a smile courtesy of Karen if she goes someplace where her regular routine doesn't feature blog updates.

It has been a strange week. And in our little corner of the online world, Karen is a shining star who will leave a huge empty space if she does take that journey alongside Michael, Billy and Farrah. I pray for her, Terry and their family.
 

It has been a really good weekend. Nothing in particular, really, so much as just appreciating and really being in the moment for lots of little things. That's what life should be, of course, but I feel it so much more right now because for so long, I really couldn't. I couldn't break away from my stress and worry about work enough to be the moments life is made of, and I was missing them.

Friday, Lee and I trimmed The Vinster's claws and gave him a bath. Not something His Weazness enjoys, but a necessary evil for him and tons of fun for us. Well, maybe not the nail clipping part. But there's nothing funnier than a freshly washed ferret rolling furiously around on your bed to dry himself off. And perhaps to punish you just a bit for plunking him in the tub by getting your sheets all damp.

Isn't he so cute all clean and fluffy?

Vinnie and Me

Me and The Vinster

After Vin's washing-up, Lee headed to bed. He's working this weekend at the PT job, and gets up at 4 a.m.! The good news for him is that he's done and home shortly after 9. I headed up to The Pub with the family. Friday marked the 3rd year anniversary of the death of a very dear friend of ours. His wife and several of our friends who were also close to him were there, and we toasted him and shared stories and remembered and did a lot of laughing and a little crying. It hurt and felt wonderful all at once.

We did the kind of shots HE used to do, which are much stronger than what we'd usually choose on our own. Mom laughed and said he was looking down on us and getting a huge kick out of watching all of us get simple for him.

This morning, I slept in until Lee got off work. Then I went out in the yard with my coffee and found my first jalopenos were ready for plucking from the garden. Just two so far, but one of them is a BIG pepper!

We went shopping later in the day, for our yard and for Father's Day gifts. We found the coolest quirky little store, a garden shop that also just sold all sorts of homey things from fireplace accessories to hot sauces and apple butter. The "greeter" at the store was a beautiful cockatiel, who shouted "HELLO!" at us from his cage the entire time we were browsing. I love places like that.

Later, we went with Lee's daughter and her boyfriend to a birthday dinner for one of her friends, and got to meet some of her crew. At some point during the meal I missed a called from my friend in Florida. She was calling to ask me if I would be one of their references as she and her husband go through their adoption process. Nothing would make me happier. They will be such wonderful parents, and she'd all but given up on that ever happening.

Life is good in so many ways. Freshly washed weasels, meals with family and friends, toasts and laughter and tears in memory of one who left too soon, bright green peppers plucked from the garden, talking birds in off-the-beaten-path shops, and a miracle for a friend who has waited so long for it she thought it was only a dream.

In such big and small ways, the world is a wonderful place.

It has been an interesting week. An interesting two years, if I really think about it. But we’ll just stick with the week.

I always said I would never be one of those people who settled. I knew far too many people who spent the bulk of their waking hours like hamsters in a wheel, doing work for which they little passion. For some, this did the trick. It allowed them to keep a roof over their family’s heads and food on the table, and maybe spend a week each year at the beach. A few even chose wisely enough to have time and energy away from their hamster wheel to pursue the things that brought them joy. Hell, a handful of my friends even earn their livings doing what they would do even if they weren’t getting paid for it.

Well, when I said I wouldn’t be one of the settlers, I lied. To myself and maybe even to people who believed in my ability to be more. But it has been myself I’ve been hurting the most. Because not only did I settle, but I didn’t choose wisely. I landed myself in a job that required far too much time and mental and emotional energy to leave enough of me left over even for dreaming, let alone for trying to pursue those dreams. I landed there, and even though I wasn’t quite happy with the view, I settled. For years.

If you’ve ever not had money, you know how easy that can be. You find something that allows you not to have your heart get caught in your throat every time a bill comes in the mail. That feels good, sometimes even good enough that you can convince yourself that you are happy.

I envy self-starters, the people who know what they want, won’t let their lives turn out any other way, and go for it. I used to think I was one. As it turns out, though, I’m one of those people who needs to be kick started.

Fate, or God, or something in between them must have recognized that. Because over the past few weeks, I’ve gotten my kick start. Just to make sure I got the message, it has been delivered right in the butt. After two years of being told and making myself believe that things would get better, I finally saw the flashing neon sign that said “Sweetheart, get real. This is gonna suck forever. Why are you clinging to it and giving it everything you’ve got instead of using what you were given to be what you want and maybe actually do some good in the process?”

The details of how that message has been delivered may not even be important. The point is, I finally got it.

So for the last few days, I have been working hard. And for the first time in eons, I’ve been doing that work for myself. I’ve polished my resume. I’ve explored all sorts of possibilities. I’ve sent out a few inquiries. With each little thing I do, I feel the mental wall that has kept me from creating words for over a year now start shifting. There are only hairline cracks in it at the moment. But the cracks are there, proof that the wall can come down if I let it.

The things that have happened were bad. The outcome, not so much.

I see glimpses of a teenage girl, a girl who had said since she was an elementary schooler with a notebook and a pencil that she was going to be a writer. I see her tall and lanky and awkward and sun-browned, poring over college catalogs and daydreaming. I see her laughing and alive, surrounded by friends who all had dreams of their own, outside somewhere on a muggy summer night where lightening bugs flickered and mosquitos bit and no one had school or work in the morning.

She’s me. And she’s in the mirror now, just a shade sometimes, but there. Her eyes shine behind those in the reflection. The lines beneath and around those eyes, thin markers of laughter and tears and far too many hours doing things that made them burn with exhaustion, they don’t hide her anymore.

A kick in the ass can do good things. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

From here.

Seriously, I don't mean to be this lame. I meant to do a lot of writing while I was on vacation last week. But being me, I didn't do jack in that respect. The vacay was far from a wash though, because I did:

- take the camping trip described in the previous entry.

- got a new kitten (photos to come). Lee's daughter's cats had kittens and we brought the littlest girl home to live with us. At least we think she's a girl so far. We all know how that went with Sylvester.

- started our veggie garden. Tomatoes, sweet and hot peppers, scallions and squash, here we come!

- go with Lee to get his tattoo (also photos to come).

- Spent lots of time (probably too much) at Ye Olde Family Pub.

- Had a great Mother's Day with the family.

On the downside, a dear family friend passed away. He had been sick and recently put in hospice, but that doesn't make it easier to see someone so good and so loved go.

I'm back at work this week, so of course I picked tonight to try to do a little writing. Big mistake. Big time writer's block is still firmly in place when it comes to anything but blogging. So I gave up and went outside to water the garden instead. As soon as I finished, it started raining.

Oh, and on the way across campus to a meeting today, I was nearly crapped on by a flying goose.

Cosmic messages from the universe, or just signs that I'm already ready for the weekend?

New Year's Eve was a lot of fun. We went to The Pub, of course, and spent the evening hanging out with the regulars, my college-buddy-turned-big-brother-for-life Sully, and ... my boss.

I have a new boss who just came on board a few months ago. He moved from the south and had a friend coming up to visit his new home for the holiday break, and was looking for somewhere they could bring in the New Year. He said his friend wasn't all that into big crowds or touristy kind of stuff, so I invited them up to the pub. I was a little nervous. It's just a little weird having your fairly new boss come hang out at the place you go to blow off steam and act like an idiot! But he and his friend had a great time, and I ended up being really glad they came.

My friend Sully crashed at our place when we finally went home, and the three of us walked out in the bitter cold morning the next day to go pick up the van. We'd gotten a ride home with a sober friend rather than risk driving. The cold woke us up, and we all went and had breakfast, then we took Sully home so that he could get ready for his sister's New Years Day dinner party. As for Lee and I, we went home and vegged in front of the TV most of the day. We decided that as much fun as we had, that is definitely it on the party-time for a while. We even decided we're just gonna stay home and cook goodies for the playoff game on Sunday rather than go to the pub. Our bodies need a break from all the celebration, and it counteracts all our good efforts at the gym!

Today has been more productive. Lee got up on the roof and put down new shingles where Wednesday's wind ripped them off. We've taken down the Christmas tree and boxed up the ornaments, which makes me a wee bit sad. That just leaves the outside decorations to deal with.

Later, we have to go pick up the hearth stand I got my Grandmom for Christmas. That was the gift I had such a hard time getting because the company wouldn't let me order it without some special confirmation letter that had come with the fireplace heater my parents had gotten them. So it ended up being late and arriving a week after Christmas. Plus, even WITH the special confirmation number finally in hand, they wouldn't let me have it delivered directly to my grandparents' house. My parents had the fireplace delivered to their place, and the company wouldn't let me have the hearth stand sent anywhere else! So we have to go pick it up at my parents and take it to Grandmoms.

I guess this is the price you pay for good old-fashioned Amish hand-crafted furniture!

Other than that, no major plans. I'm just trying to stay mellow, rested and in a positive frame of mind for next week's return to the craziness of my job.

I absolutely adore the holidays. In the past, I've always sort of felt a bit bummed the day after Christmas. I mean, all that decorating, shopping, partying, wrapping, cooking, planning, feasting, giving ... and then, boom! Everything is over in the blink of an eye.

This year, my attitude is a little different, though. I am absolutely reveling in the low-key quiet of the day after Christmas. I am ready for a lot less "run, run, run" and a lot more "relax, relax, relax!"

On Christmas Eve, I worked until about 4:30. The boss let most of the staff go, and me, him and one other manager who was working stayed until the end and covered the counter and the phones. What an eye opening experience that was! I haven't worked the counter in a REALLY long time, and a lot of things have changed since I moved to The Project and started spending most of my workdays away from the office. Questions from callers that used to be things I could answer in my sleep are now things I had to put people on hold and ask the boss or the other gal about.

Funny, I've never been so immersed in my job before. But at the same time, being so far removed from the day to day while on this special assignment makes me feel very far away from it sometimes.

When I came home, I finished up the last minute wrapping then Lee and I went to my parent's place for a Christmas Eve dinner of ham and salads. We all sat around and had a few glasses of wine and lots of chit-chat. I'm used to our family Christmas Eves being a mad frenzy of trying to get my niece into bed so that all the last minute wrapping and assembling of gifts can be done. I'm not the only procrastinator in my family! The first year I brought Lee to my parent's house for Christmas, we were up with my sister until 2 a.m. putting together a computer desk she had gotten my niece.

This year, though, it seemed that I was the only one still wrapping on Christmas Eve. My family was all ahead of the game, so we just got to kick back and relax.

Christmas Eve really brought home to me just how much my niece is at that odd and awkward age between "little girl" and "teenager."

Her wish list was all clothes and things like a new IPOD, and she wanted to know how a bunch of elves in Santa's workshop could make things from stores like Aeropostle and Hollister. We're all pretty sure she doesn't really believe in Santa anymore, but she's afraid to admit it because somewhere along the way, she's gotten the idea that the piles of presents under the tree for her will dwindle to "grown-up sized piles" if she admits she questions The Guy In The Red Suit. She figures that as long as she continues to believe in Santa, we'll continue to do our parts in convincing her by piling up the prezzies!

She sat and chatted with the adults instead of running to the computer every five minutes to track Santa, as she has for the last few years. But yet, when it came close to her bedtime and my mom went to honor the tradition of giving her a package with new PJs for Christmas Eve, all hell broke loose for a minute. Mom brought the wrong wrapped package out, and Niece promptly burst into tears after opening it, declaring "oh no! These aren't my Christmas pajamas and we don't know where they are and I don't want to open all my presents!"

The storm subsided when Mom found the PJs, and I sat with niece and teased her into being calmer and thought to myself "damn, I'm soooo glad my hormonal adolescent years are long gone!"

Lee and I came home and spent some time with Vin and Sly, got some shut-eye, and headed back for the present frenzy and the family Christmas breakfast.

I was thrilled with my gifts, which included a wonderful new wine rack for Lee and I, a Palomalu jersey (woo-hoo!), perfume, my favorite lip glosses, PJs, earrings and lots of other cool stuff.

And the hit gift in terms of what I gave others? Believe it or not, it was elephant poop. 

My sister loves elephants, and collects anything elephant-related. So, even though I had already gotten her gifts, I was in the bookstore earlier this week buying a few books I knew Mom wanted to read, and happened to pass a stationary display. It was journals and address books and note cards all made from ... processed elephant poop.

I grabbed a journal for Sis, really as a gag gift more than anything else. And it turned out to be one of her favorite gifts of the year!

After Christmas breakfast and presents, Lee and I headed home and took a nice long nap, then got up and headed back to the Parental Abode for lasagna dinner and family game night. All in all, it was a wonderful, peaceful, relaxing day with loved ones. I couldn't ask for more than that!

Today, we started making up for the lack of workout time and the holiday munch-fest of the last week by spending some extra time in the gym, then went to the grocery store and stocked back up on healthy stuff. We're determined to get back on the wagon here. Of course, football festivities on Sunday and New Year's Eve will throw a few curveballs into the mix, but until then, we're being good!

I hope the day after Christmas is one of rest and continuing time with family and friends for all of you - no one should have to go back to work the day after such a holiday!

Five days since I posted!! What the heck?

And I'm scrawling this one out in a mad between-meetings-cram-a-sandwich-down-my-face-while-I-type break. Ugh.

To sum it up:
- No free time at all

- Work party went off without a hitch in spite of the fact that while I was setting up the food platters at the pub some strange and very creepy-ish hillbilly-looking dude I've ever seen there before came up to me and said "you sure are purty ... what's yer name?"

I am used to being approached by weird people in the pub. My whole family is - it is as much a part of the business as too much time sitting on your butt is part of an office worker's life. But I was seriously afraid this guy would do the same thing to my female co-workers when they arrived for the party. They're NOT all used to hillbilly creepyishness.

Luckily, he left before the coworkers arrived!

- Because this is our consultants last week before the holidays, I have been swamped with trying to get a million things that need to be done in conjunction with them finished before they go. My head is spinning, I wake up startled from work dreams, and it generally bites butt. But the holidays are just around the bend.

- Also trying to cram in the gym, last minute shopping, and wrapping presents. Oh, and the pub's holiday party is tomorrow night.

- I am sooooo looking forward to having time to curl up with a cup of coffee or tea and write something real. It WILL come. It must.

Happy Thursday!

... there were many things I wanted to blog about and didn't, because time ran away from me.

1. There was the act of kindness that made my day and saved me a lot of aggravation. Lee and I commute to work together when I go in really early, and have a ritual of stopping at the same convenience store every day for coffee on the way. Since it is so early, there's rarely many other people there, and the 2 morning shift clerks have come to recognize us and know our habits. The guy double-checks that we haven't just forgotten something if Lee doesn't grab a banana or I don't pick up a pack of gum. He always jokes with us after game days because he knows about our divided football fandom.

The other day, we were pulling out of the parking lot after being in the store and the clerk came running out after us, waving something in the air. It turned out that in my early-morning foggy-headed state, I had gotten money out of the ATM while going over a presentation I had to give later in the day in my head. I got so into thinking about the speech that I forgot to get my bank card from the machine.The clerk realized it and came running after us just before we pulled back out into the street.

I think I should get him a little Christmas gift for that. He saved me the hassle of having to call and cancel my card and get a new one, which was definitely a chore I didn't need added to my list!

2. Lee has a job interview today - actually, he went in to talk to the company informally yesterday and goes back this morning for something more formal. He's miserable at his job. This one would be more interesting work, and they seem to really be biting on his resume. Even better, his shift would be 4 ten-hour days and he'd get every Friday off in addition to the weekends. Keep your fingers crossed for him, please.

Heck, if I could afford the pay cut and was capable of doing the heavy lifting and mechanical type of work he does, I'd apply there too, just for the 4-day-workweek!

3. I am hosting a holiday party for our project team at my family's pub on Monday. So when I haven't been working this week, I've been planning party details. Having co-workers at the pub is always an adventure, because I never know what kind of characters they'll meet.

4. I am learning that even in today's economy, some companies make it downright impossible to buy something! As an early holiday gift, my parents bought my grandparents one of those heaters that is designed to look like a fireplace. It was something my grandmom really wanted. The heater was delivered last week. We decided that I would order one of the hand-crafted hearth stands the company makes for the heaters to sit on as my gift to them, because Grandmom really wanted that too. I called them Monday to place the order. They told me I couldn't order it without a number that came on a letter that was sent to my family with the heater. I guess they don't sell the hearths to people who haven't bought one of the fireplace heaters or something, I dunno.

So I call my mom to get the number. Like me, my family is not the best at remembering where they store paperwork. We all just tend to throw it in a storage space somewhere and forget about it. So it took Mom a day or two to dig up the receipt, and she couldn't find the letter. She called me with what she THOUGHT was the number on the receipt, but when I called the company back they said that was an order number, but not the number they needed, and they couldn't help me.

Ummm ... if I have the name under which the original order was placed, AND the order number, why can't they just pull up the info in THEIR system and give ME the "special confirmation number?" Ugh. I mean, these heaters and hearths aren't cheap. You'd think in this economy they'd be bending over backwards to make a sale.

If it wasn't for the fact that my grandmother REALLY wants this thing, I'd give up and come up with another Christmas gift idea just on principle. As it stands, though, I'll be calling Mom and sending her back on the mad hunt through her paperwork chaos to try to find me this letter with the magic numbers on it.

5. My neck of the woods is all about the upcoming Ravens/Steelers game this weekend. My Ravens fan co-workers have been ribbing me all week, both in the office and on Facebook. Of course, I rib right back. And you can only imagine what it is like at home with Lee and I!

Yesterday I forgot to take my phone to work with me (I've been forgetful about A LOT of things this week - I guess I'm just overloaded!). When Lee got a call about coming in for the first step in that job interview, he decided to grab my phone and drop it off to me, since my work is on the way to where he had to go. He knew I would be working late and didn't want to wait to tell me about the interview. My consultant and I had gone to lunch, but my ex-boss-now-part-time-teammate was working in the office that he and I share when Lee came by. When I got back from lunch, he said "Hey, Lee brought your phone by, it's on your desk. And by the way, he was wrapped up in so much Ravens gear I couldn't even tell who it was at first!"

Too bad I wasn't there when he came by. I could have taken him around and introduced him to the other Ravens guys, and they all could have picked on me together!

6. I have that Blink 182 "I Won't Be Home For Christmas" song completely stuck in my head. Funny thing is, I didn't even hear it on the radio. My division at work had a holiday reception yesterday after work. One of the boy's choral clubs came to sing for us, and that was one of the songs they did.

There's something REALLY funny about a group of young men who look and sound like they should be singing religious Christmas carols in a church singing a song that includes lines about being sent to jail for freaking out on Christmas carolers and having "Bubba unwrap my package." Gotta love the holidays!  

Happy Friday ... I am sooooo ready for the weekend!  

When you are working too much to blog OR go to the gym!

I just realized that it is already Wednesday night and I never even thought about "Things on Tuesday!"

In addition to blowing off my two favorite mental health outlets (the gym is good for the mind as well as the bod, in terms of helping me de-stress, relax and sleep better), I also feel like I've spent next to no real quality time with Lee, and I'm falling way behind on holiday stuff.

Heck, I even blew off a ceremony today where I was one of the people getting an award. Instead of accepting my award, I was giving a project related demo to another group.

All work and no play is making me tired and cranky.

But I did get to see the Steelers turn it all around on the Cowboys Sunday, and that was good. Lee and I went over my parents' house to watch the game with Mom and Dad, and ended up having to watch the game in separate rooms because Dad and Lee were getting on mine and Mom's nerves with their anti-Steelerism! They were sooooo sure it would be The Cowboys' game. There was a 5-second-or-so delay on their TV, so Mom and I were seeing what was happening moments before them. When they heard us squealing and screaming at the interception that won the game, they just looked at each other and said "uh-oh, this can't be good ..."

But it was good, for us anyway!

I finally got to catch up on blogs tonight. Glad to see that most of my Vox friends are well!

Off to collapse in my nice warm bed, and snuggle my guy for a while.  

Or maybe I should say, a way with exaggerating MY words!

On Monday, I worked from 6 am - 5 pm. Then Lee and I went to the gym. We came home, ate some sandwiches, and I jumped in the shower. That's a long day, and it was the first of 5 of them. I was tired and maybe just a little grumpy. My steaming hot shower and girly good-smelling lotion had me just starting to feel somewhat relaxed. And then ...

I turned off the water and thought I heard voices in the living room. Lee's, and someone else's. Now, we rarely get unexpected visitors. We just don't have drop-by-unannounced kinds of friends and family. Occasionally, the neighbors will pop over, but that's about it. And since I didn't recognize the other voice, I knew this wasn't our neighbors.

I bundled up in a towel and stayed in the bathroom, listening, and heard the unmistakable sounds of the dreaded door-to-door-salesman. He was attempting to get Lee and I to switch from our current cable and internet provider to the one he works for. He was perky and friendly and oh-so-convincing.

And he annoyed the heck out of me. See, when your household is just you and your partner, you don't always think about taking a change of clothes into the bathroom with you. At least I don't when I'm tired and cranky. I just wrap up in a towel and go figure out what I'm changing into in the bedroom. I mean, it isn't like Lee hasn't seen me naked. Our house is small, and there's no way I could get from the bathroom to the bedroom without chancing the salesman seeing me. My only option would have been to crawl back into the clothes I'd just worn to the gym, which is NOT what you want to do after a nice fresh shower.

The truth is, he could have been offering us their service for next to free and I probably wouldn't have wanted to take the bite, because I just hate high-pressure knock-on-the-door sales strategy that much, not to mention that I'm not a big fan of being trapped in my bathroom naked. If I am in the market for something, I'll come looking for YOU. Please don't come to my house and try to sell me stuff. I know this is because I have a very undernourished introverted side that is forced to deal with people almost every moment of my 10-12 hour workdays. But I can't change that. So when I come home, I just don't want to interact unless it is with Lee, my family, or my friends. I am done with business-related conversations - more than done.

So shiny happy TV-and-internet service guy lost me with his first rap on the door. I stayed huddled in the bathroom and Lee said "she's in the shower, let us talk it over and we'll get back to you." Of course, the guy talked him into agreeing that he would stop by at 7 on Tuesday evening to talk to us some more. By then, I was really getting irked, and thinking "Salesdude, I don't want to talk to you ANY weekday evening. Capiche? Now go away so I can put some clothes on."

 But Lee is like me. He's too nice to say no, and when put on the spot like that, has trouble being direct. That's the other thing I hate about the door-to-door tactic. You haven't had time to think things through, and you have this "nice" person standing in front of you, and you don't want to be rude. At least that's how I feel. And they know just how to dig in and make it feel like saying no IS rude, instead of them bombarding you at dinnertime or the only time you have during the day to relax being the impolite part of the whole encounter. Blech.

So Salesdude left. I crept out of the bathroom like a kid in a hide-and-seek game, like I thought the guy might peek through the window, see I was available (and wearing nothing but a towel), and rap on the door again or something. We looked over the papers he'd left with Lee, and decided we definitely didn't want to switch providers. That's mainly because my ex and I actually DID use the service the salesman was peddling years ago, and had a lot of problems with it. Every time the wind blew or there was something even close to a storm, our service went down.

That was the reason. But the truth is, the guy could have sworn to me that this would never happen again, and promised me big fat checks if it did, and I still wouldn't have switched. Because they tried door-to-door sales and made me feel like I didn't wanna leave my bathroom.

So we made our decision, and forgot about it. When we got home last night, we realized the guy was scheduled to show up on our doorstep again in an hour. So Lee picks up the phone, and says we're not interested and he shouldn't bother coming by.

"She was actually with you guys a few years ago," he adds, "and she thought the service was really shitty."

The funny thing was, he said this in such a soft, NICE way, like he was just making conversation. It was the most pleasant tone of voice in which I have ever heard someone tell a salesperson "no thanks, your service sucks."

"I didn't say shitty," I said when he hung up the phone. "I just said the service went down all the time."

"That means shitty, babe," he replied and pulled out the stuff to start making dinner.

Maybe there's a door-to-door-salesman "don't go there" list. Hopefully, this little episode got us on it!